Ramblings of an Idiosyncratic Homosexual

Yesterday Daniel and I joined a gym.

I know right. Me, doing exercise. The idea is actually hilarious because, I do not do exercise. I have enough trouble getting out of bed in the morning, I try to avoid stairs wherever possible, and if I cant find the remote, Ill just watch whatever is on tv or else perish whilse trying to reach the remote. What is even more hilarious is the visual of me doing exercise. Of course I am only speculating this atm moment, because I have no idea what I would look like doing exercise. One reasoon for this is because I do not do any exercise.

While joing the gym, the lady asks if we would like to sign up for personal trainer classes. Are you joking? You cant be serious? You want me to pay someone to torture me. You want me to pay someone $40 an hour to act like a vulture, ready to exploit me. You want me to pay you to ‘push me till I collapse”?

No Thanks.

So this morning was my first day of gym. We went and bought all the gear. Gym shoes. I colour cordinated an outfit with my new shoes and existing shorts with a new sports top. I totally looked the part. Of course I really struggled to get out of bed this morning. So we have no gym today. Maybe we can go tonight. This is the problem I have with the gym. I can never motivate myself to go. I was thinking that with Daniel and I both going we would be able to motivate each other. Howver we are both lazy. Oh god this gym thing is hard.

Why isnt there a pill that you can take that makes you beautiful and toned and skinny.

I should have taken her up on those personal training lessons.


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