Ramblings of an Idiosyncratic Homosexual

Posts tagged ‘live’

7 Things I Hate About You

So I have this friends that I don’t get to see very much. I love her to death but there is defiantly a reason that I try to avoid spending any quality time with her. This is because I find her utterly pathetic and irritable. I find her more annoying the a rock in your shoe, or that one fly that has a whole hose to fly around, but insists that it needs to fly around your face and in your ear.

So this, Molly (not a real name), is a list of 7 things I hate about you.

Dear Molly,

1: I hate that you always think about yourself and no one else. You are no more important that anyone else.

2: You have had a bad day, get over it. I’ve had 3!

3: Learn to dress, that skirt does NOT look good on you.

4: Yes I think your a slut whore bag mole bitch who doesn’t care enough about her boyfriend because people who love other can’t cheat. Simple. ( I may have just given this away)

5: Guess what!? I’m gay! I’m not going to sleep with you! Plus I’m married. And vaginas are gross.

6: I don’t particularly like your friends. Stop asking me to hang out with them.

7: I really hate you think your attractive and sexy. Your not. Stop trying.

This may seem harsh, Molly, but I still love you. I wouldn’t be a very good friend if I didn’t tell you these things. And since your name is not Molly ad your so dumb you probably have no idea that in talking about you, I guess in not a very good friend. However 8 years is a long time and I’m not going to throw it away just because your everything I stated above…

Regards
Chadlington X